Murder or Marriage?

So . . . I recently recorded a video for my Youtube channel on things AI and by recently, I mean just now . . . five minutes ago. I wanted to show folks how to convert the markdown formatting from ChatGPT to DOCX format so I had ChatGPT write a short essay that was formatted. I thought of a topic off the top of my head . . . compare Murder versus Marriage . . . it was genuinely off the top of my head.

Of course, one should not read too much into the topic choice . . . I love my wife and am thrilled to be married to her. Two weeks ago, we celebrated our thirtieth wedding anniversary and I look forward to many decades more.

In any case, just for fun, here’s the essay ChatGPT spat out for us. Choose Love . . . always choose love.

Ah, marriage over murder, you say? Well, let’s dive into this intriguing, albeit slightly macabre, comparison with a pinch of humor and a heap of seriousness, shall we? At first glance, one might chuckle at the stark contrast between the two “M”s, but if we peel back the layers (not in a Dexter kind of way, I promise), we’ll find some compelling advantages of tying the knot over, well, tying the noose.

The Ultimate Team-Up
Marriage

First off, marriage is the ultimate partnership, akin to Batman and Robin, but with less spandex and more joint tax returns. It’s about having a constant teammate, someone to share life’s ups and downs, from the thrilling episodes of binge-watching your favorite series to the nail-biting seasons of “What’s for dinner?” It’s a journey of mutual growth, learning, and endless inside jokes that only the two of you will laugh at. Murder, on the contrary, is a rather solitary affair, and let’s face it, the only thing growing there is the pile of evidence against you.

Emotional Bank Account
Deposits vs. Withdrawals

Imagine your emotional well-being as a bank account. Marriage (in its ideal form) is like making consistent deposits into this account, enriching your life with support, companionship, and love. Sure, there might be occasional overdrafts—arguments over who forgot to take the trash out or whether pineapple belongs on pizza (it does, fight me). But overall, the balance grows over time. Murder, however, is the ultimate withdrawal, depleting your emotional account faster than you can say “alibi.” It’s a debt that keeps on taking, not just from you but from others around you, leaving a void where there once was the potential for connection and growth.

Societal Bonuses and Power-Ups

Now, let’s talk power-ups and societal bonuses. Marriage grants you a plethora of perks, from legal benefits like tax breaks and spousal privileges to social perks like plus-ones to every event and the universal nod of approval when you say, “My spouse and I…” Try replacing “spouse” with “accomplice” in that sentence and watch the room’s temperature drop. Murder, aside from being morally and legally reprehensible, offers no such benefits. The closest thing to a power-up it provides is an adrenaline rush, which, spoiler alert, is vastly overshadowed by the perpetual looking over your shoulder for law enforcement.

Choose Love
Not Loathing

So, when it comes down to it, choosing marriage over murder is a no-brainer. It’s about selecting love, companionship, and growth over solitude, guilt, and a lifetime of looking over your shoulder. Let’s opt for making deposits into our emotional bank accounts, enjoying the societal perks, and fostering connections that enrich our lives. And remember, the next time you’re faced with a difficult spouse-versus-suspect decision, ask yourself: “Would I rather have a partner in crime-solving, not crime-committing?” Keep it light, keep it legal, and here’s to choosing love every single time. Cheers to the happy, not heinous, choices we make in life!

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Live Trance and Prosper,
Brian David Phillips
Trance Wizard
www.BrianDavidPhillips.net/blog